Kids = My Daily Heart Attack

As the kids sit quietly in the living room playing with toys (each with their OWN toy, not battling to the death over the same piece of junk McD Happy Meal toy that NO ONE has touched in six months- it's a miracle!). Perfect time for me to slip downstairs and turn the laundry over. Estimated total time with eyes off kids: 3.4 minutes.*

I get the laundry turned over in a minute or so when my peaceful haven known as cleaning out the lint trap without a child attached to me is interrupted by the sound of one Little Man thumping down the stairs. He stands at the landing and asks me what I'm doing, and then looks up the stairs as we both hear The Princess descending the stairs as well.
Suddenly, Little Man GASPS and says, "Oh no Mommy!!! The Princess COLOURED ALL OVER HERSELF!!! Look! Looooooooooook!" All the thoughts run through my head in a nanosecond as I boot it up the stairs. Crap! How did she get a hold of the markers? How did she do that so fast? What else has she coloured all over? Please let it be the washable crayolas and not the permanent sharpies...
Arrive at the top of the stairs to a perfectly normal looking toddler. What the??
"Little Man, what are you talking about she coloured all over herself?"
"Look! It's right there!" And he points to a rather small unoffending blotch of ketchup on her pants from lunch that didn't even warrant changing her (though who are we kidding, who wants more laundry, she'd just be pantsless had it been that big a mess at lunch...).
Seriously child?!? Gah! Heart attack.

At least I didn't have to clean up any markers... ;).





*If you're a parent, you're already saying, maybe out loud to no one in particular (because we're crazy like that), "Uh oh, this is going to be bad."